Kathryn Pellicotte ‘29
Petunia Spokesperson
You may have noticed that the various pots and beds of flowers around campus have once again changed. Chrysanthemums. Beautiful blooms just perfect for fall, so perfect that we all just up and forgot about those bright pink and purple petunias that used to be there. You maybe didn’t even notice that those flowers were dug up in the height of their bloom only to be replaced with something more “seasonal.” Festivities are the excuse, but this feels like a cover-up. Luckily, the petunia population has come forward with nothing but the truth, and below is a synopsis of of that conversation:
…
Sike! Flowers don’t talk!
But here are some guesses as to why Holy Cross spends a whole bunch of money on buying flowers and fertilizer, and then paying some dudes to come and use big fancy machines to rip out the flowers and half of the fertilizer so that they have have to buy even more fertilizer for next time:
- Tuition was raised so why not
- It’s fun to block all the main walk-ways with tractors
- We like to dig holes
Now, this is not to say that those chrysanthemums don’t look absolutely darling, because they do! One chrysanthemum (this one could talk somehow) has come forward out of her borrowed bed with this statement: “Everyone says to grow where you’re planted, but that’s just hogwash in our case. Like, I got petunia roots up my ass the minute I’m dumped in there and—” Unfortunately, this chrysanthemum was ripped out with a back-hoe before she could finish. Something about winter prep. Anyways folks, enjoy the upcoming fall weather but remember, if yer mum is mad you had better listen!
Copy edited by Eliza Martin ‘29
Featured image courtesy of Magnific
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