The Spire

Holy Cross Cupid

Question: Hey Spire. I’ve been with my high school boyfriend for almost four years now. He goes to a different college. He is the perfect guy – so sweet and supportive, and I really see a future with him. The problem is that, at the start of this fall semester, I started developing feelings for a different guy from my classes and other campus involvements. I can’t shake the feelings – it’s been over two months now. I also can’t decide if the new crush is about this guy specifically, or if it’s just excitement around the idea of new love, something I haven’t experienced for over four years. What should I make of this?

Answer: If your boyfriend isn’t one of the first things that come to mind when you’re asked what you’re grateful for at Thanksgiving, it might say something about where your relationship truly stands.

 If you simply feel disconnected from your boyfriend because of the physical distance, I would suggest waiting until Thanksgiving break or winter break. This way you can properly determine if the only issue is distance. In order to make a long distance relationship work, it takes two individuals who constantly and consistently make an effort. Rather than making a spontaneous decision that you might regret, wait to see each other one more time. When you see your boyfriend, communicate that you feel a slight disconnect and want to make more efforts to grow your relationship while away at school. If after the winter break you are still interested in someone else, then it is only fair to end your relationship because you don’t want to waste your boyfriend’s time since he sounds like a great guy.

Best of luck!

Love,

Holy Cross Cupid

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