In light of recent and shocking political shifts in the United States, a stunning reform in Canadian Immigration has been passed by the Liberal Party of Canada this past Thursday, now known as the Furo Dampnum Act, or, in English, the Sore-Loser Immigration Act. While the immigration policies […]
It is officially no longer socially acceptable for first-year students to not know how to do laundry, experts say. Furthermore, additional studies show that the students who have not learned how to do laundry by Thanksgiving Break will remain unable to do so for the rest of their […]
In the midst of a very tough time for all of us students, resident sophomore Richard Seymour reports that he has just way too much work to hang out right now. His roommate, Larry Wilson, tells The Eggplant that he has asked several times if Richard wanted to […]
It is with a heavy heart that I write to inform you that our dearly beloved Political Satire has been found dead at the age of 424. This news struck us dearly as a satirical page. Alas, as we all know, the tides ebb and flow and the […]
The day is January 20, 2017 and Obama is moving out of the White House after eight years of presidency. Barack and Michelle are strolling through the rooms, making sure they didn’t leave anything and reminiscing over the time they spent in the most famous house in the […]
They come out in droves. When the sun goes down on Friday evening, the festivities begin. Since the old days, the tradition has been upheld by university students throughout the world. The weekend before Halloween is the time when costumes are donned. They range from classics such as […]
Despite all the jokes and hilarious SNL skits that have come out about this topic, we only have one option this fall. In this presidential election, we are at a crossroads for our country’s history. The only option we have right now is Hillary Rodham Clinton. Now I […]
The date is January 20, 2017. After a long inaugural ceremony and ball, Donald Trump or Hillary Clinton will be settling into the White House. Our magic crystal ball does not allow us to foresee which candidate will be living on Pennsylvania Avenue, but it does show us […]
It’s that time of year again. The weather is changing, almost as frequently as your typical Holy Cross girl changes her clothes before embarking off campus. Let’s face it: we all know that an hour can easily turn into four hours of makeup, hair, and outfit prep. The […]
A Holy Cross sophomore, who wishes to remain anonymous, reports that her Catalina outfit this year will far surpass the one she wore last year. “Well, I saw ‘Step Brothers’ for the first time over the summer,” she confided, referring to the Will Ferrell movie considered by many […]
Breaking the endorsement drought for Donald Trump, four major “religious figures” endorsed him this Monday. Appearing through a tear between the worlds, the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse delivered an endorsement for the Republican candidate that was projected into the minds of everyone on Earth. Before this rift […]
Recently there has been great demand for the release of the two main presidential nominees’ health records. Though Trump and Clinton have shared some medical information, voters are still yearning for more. Luckily for us, anonymous sources have recently obtained full health reports for both candidates, and we […]
The Spire 