Category: Eggplant

A Thousand Word Picture

Mario Micallef ’22 An EggPlanting Editor [On a Teleprompter, somewhere out There.] “A picture paints a thousand words,” so they say, but does it really? Find out all about it tonight on Eggplant Live, with me, your host – Rosel McDork.  [Queue uplifting yet stern, royalty-free broadcast music.] […]

Haircut

Mario Micallef An Eggplant Exquisite choice Bernadette. Yes, one long cut across my bangs goes stupendously with my four eyes and buck teeth. I cannot wait to see Bruce in Gym class tomorrow. I am sure he will have nothing but nice things to say to me. Gone […]

All Ears

Mario Micallef Eggplant Editor All Ears Once there was a girl, and she was asked a question. “Girl, do listen up, will you hear my newest obsession?” Girl wore a thick dark cloak; nobody ever saw her reflection. “Indeed I shall, Madam May, I am all ears.” She […]

If Campion House Cookie Emails and Ever-fi Course Reminder Emails Traded Their Respective Tones: A Study

Hannah Johnson ‘21 Decorated Researcher Email #1: Subject: ONLINE OPPORTUNITY TODAY: Ever-fi courses! Message: Drop by a computer TODAY anytime for an online Ever-fi course and a socially-distanced ‘hello’ from the Office of Student Wellness Education!  Message #2: OOPS! Anytime before 11:59pm TODAY!  (The Director needs a cup […]

Smash Ultimate DLC Predictions: Mario

Dennis Liu ’22 STEPDAD Big news broke out on the internet last week. News surrounding an important figure, beknown to many. I am, of course, talking about Steve of Minecraft fame. The new fighter joining the battle in the critically acclaimed fighting game crossover, Super Smash Brothers Ultimate, […]