Julianna Mariani ‘24

The Group Chat

Well, here it is folks. Halloweekend has finally arrived. Ironic how Oct. 31 falls on the scariest day, huh? The Sunday scaries are going to be doubled this week. I mean, whose idea of a sick joke was that? Making Halloween on a school night. Ridiculous. When I was five it didn’t matter because kindergarten teachers don’t give homework, but that was the last time. Ever since then, teachers couldn’t have cared less. What’s up with that? It’s a holiday, is it not? So why was I doing geometry in my devil costume four years ago? Lame. Anyway, this year I plan to actually not procrastinate and get all my work done before Sunday. Ha, that’ll be a Halloween miracle. 

I don’t even know what Halloween is like on the Hill. Like most things that occur in the fall here, I missed out on the true college Halloween experience. Not that I’m complaining. Last year I made the most incredible chicken and dumpling soup (which was a whole day process), and my roommate and I ate it in front of the TV with our cat ears on. Top Ten Halloween for sure. But I digress, I’m a little nervous for Halloweekend here, to be honest. I mean, what should I be expecting? 

Do I need to buy candy for trick-or-treating? Am I gonna be getting knocks on my door at 2 a.m. with drunk college kids begging me for Snickers? That sounds like something out of a horror movie, so I hope not. It’s also going to be cold, and I don’t think it’s socially appropriate to wear black leggings and a massive turtleneck under a ladybug tutu anymore. Sorry Mom, times have changed. Guess I’m getting sick this Halloween.

Do I need to appoint a “mom of the friend group” for the whole weekend? You know, the one that tests all the candy to make sure it’s “safe” and the one who makes sure we all don’t get lost in the streets of Worcester. I’m not sure I’m cut out for that role. Well, the testing candy part maybe.

How many costumes do I actually need? Friday night, Saturday afternoon, Saturday night, Sunday afternoon, and Sunday night? Five costumes? That seems excessive but maybe not. Of course, I’m a broke college kid so I can’t actually afford to buy five new costumes that I’m going to wear one time. Maybe my friends and I should do a little bit of The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants action for the weekend. That seems cost effective. 

If I said all I wanted to do was stay in bed and watch “Hocus Pocus” and “Coraline”… would that be frowned upon? It sounds ideal to me. Or what if I went actual trick-or-treating in the surrounding neighborhoods? Do you think a 5’9” college kid could pass as a fourth grader in search of the pull apart Twizzlers? You know the ones. I’ll take no slander against them, Twizzlers are incredible.

So many questions, so many concerns. We’ll see how it goes though. Hopefully the scariest thing that will happen to me this weekend will be figuring out what costume to wear and when. Godspeed everyone.