Kelly Gallagher ’22
Chief Features Editor

Editor’s note: This article appears in our annual Eggplant Edition, comprised exclusively of satirical articles.

Name: Odie 

Hometown: The woods behind Figge 

Major: Aromatherapy 

Campus Activities: Joining the RAs on their nighttime rounds, dumpster diving, perfuming

Favorite Movie: “Swamp Thing” 

Favorite song: “Smells Like Teen Spirit,” by Nirvana; “Baby Come Back,” by Player

Favorite singer/group: Panic! At the Disco 

Favorite color: Toxic green 

Favorite sports team: It seems like there are a lot of talented sprinters on campus!

Favorite class taken at Holy Cross: Entomology because of all the free snacks 

Favorite Professor: The ones with night classes – I appreciate that they work with my schedule 

Item on HC Bucket List: See what the inside of a dorm building looks like

Biggest HC Regret: Trying to sneak into Spring Concert without a wristband 

Embarrassing HC Moment: A student called Pub Safe complaining about weed use, but it was just me taking a nap

Bragging Rights: I look absolutely smashing in stripes 

Words to live by: Deodorant is an option, not a rule 

One thing you would change at HC: I hear you guys are looking for a new mascot…. Hint hint….

Favorite TV Show: “The Bachelor” – such finer trash I have never seen  

Favorite Book: “How to Win Friends and Influence People” by Dale Carnegie 

Favorite food: Those weird brownies the first-years make 

Favorite Drink: Apple cider vinegar is so fragrant 

Favorite spot on campus: Wherever you least expect to find me 

Favorite off-campus restaurant: Taco Bell. Their dumpster delight is to die for, and I almost have. 

Guilty Pleasure: A spritz of Chanel No. 5 

Some small things that make your day better: Getting a nice pat on the head, so don’t be afraid to say hi! 

First thing you do when you wake up: Check my morning breath 

Last thing you do before going to bed: Reload 

Favorite place you have traveled to: I’m quite the homebody, but I travelled to Wal-Mart once! 

Role-model: That raccoon on TikTok that squeezed down the gutter 

Something you look forward to when you go home: Fumigating 

Post-Graduation Plans: I dream of opening my own flower kiosk

Favorite memory at HC: Waking up early one evening to watch the sun set over Dinand with my friends