Seniors Could Be Putting Less Effort In

Annie Henschel ’19

Eggplant Editor

Seniors on the Hill are facing their busiest year yet. In addition to keeping up with their upper-level classes, they now have to navigate cooking for themselves, focus on finding a job for next year, and maintaining the perfect swug aesthetic.

Swug stands for Senior Washed Up Girl, although seniors of all genders have adopted the term for their own. Typically, swugs can be identified by their messy hair, baggy eyes, and general presence in the pub on on a Tuesday night.

Swug season arrived early this year on Mt. St. James. By the fourth day of classes, seniors who usually wore contact lenses to their 8 ams were forgoing them for the comfort and ease of glasses. This quickly devolved to wearing leggings instead of jeans, sweatshirts instead of sweaters, and dry shampoo instead of showering.

How do seniors manage to look so effortlessly effortless? According to a series of exclusive interviews conducted by The Eggplant, it is a lot harder than it seems.

“I put on mascara in the morning and then rub my eyes to get that perfect slept-in-my makeup look,” stated one senior girl.

I need to make sure I wear the same shirt at least twice a week,” reported senior Peter Fantozzi. “It’s actually not that hard because I only own four shirts.”

Another girl reported that she hasn’t brushed her hair since she last washed it, so it’s been at least 8 days since she’s brushed her hair.

Josh Clark ‘19 reportedly spend upwards of $500 on several pairs of Crocs because they are “low-key”.

The stress of looking like you don’t care is really taking a toll on some of our seniors. “Is wearing a perfectly matching groutfit trying too hard? Or is wearing a groutfit with different shades of gray trying too hard, like it looks like you didn’t want to match? Thinking about what I’m wearing off-campus this much is definitely trying too hard. Wait, is going to parties at all trying too hard? Am I trying too hard? IT CANNOT LOOK LIKE I AM TRYING TOO HARD.”

At press time, Jason Millson ‘19 was pretending to fall asleep in public, only to periodically get up and ask passersby if HC Sleeps was still a thing since he went abroad.
Photo courtesy of College of the Holy Cross

Categories: Eggplant, features

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